Thanks for checking out the new column. Before I start it off, I just want to say that my opinions don't necessarily represent those at BYWL. Heh, there, that felt cool. Ok, now in this column, I'll be letting everyone know what I think is wrong with some backyard wrestling feds... but there's a good part. I won't just sit there and bitch about the problems... I'll give suggestions on how they can be solved. The problem areas will be in bold. If you don't need help on a specific area, just skip to the next bold letters. If you have any problems you want some advice on, or just want to flame me for trying to write a good column, you can email me at or And here we go...

Sometimes I hear "Damn, we look pretty unprofessional." Well, first off, its backyard wrestling, not professional wrestling. But then again, you don't want to look like a bunch of jackasses wearing your mother's spandex workout tights and leg warmers jumping on a trampoline while some loud hard-core music is played (if you're into hip-hop, substitute "gangster rap" in place of "hard-core"). Have no fear, because, in reality, your fed can also look semi-professional!

Entranceway: First off, we will start where the show starts, the entranceway. In most cases, not much attention is paid to this. Rather than entering from a fence door, or just walking in between two trees, consider a shower curtain at least. It can be easily mounted by sticking two poles in the ground and tying the curtain to the poles, or simply by tying it between two tress. That way, you at least have something to swoosh through. You can even spray faint the fed initials or whole name on the curtain. Or, to be more elaborate, you can create an entrance shack. It can go from a shed, house, or big plywood box. As long as it is placed well enough (its hard to place a house well, but use what you can) and semi decorated with fed initials, etc., it should look good. I know it sounds dumb and unimpressive, but the AOW (a really good fed that broke up because their champ went indy) used this sort of entrance way, and it really worked well.

Walkway: Following the entranceway is the walkway. This will also (if done correctly) make your fed look pretty damn good. Now I'm not saying go purchase a giant metal ramp, but try, if at all possible, to use something for the walkway. Rather than ground... you can put a long tarp down. If you want to go a little bigger, dig a small trench, and put some chicken wire in it so it pokes up a few feet above the ground. And if you wanna do some real hard work, buy half of a few tires in the ground along each side of where you want your walkway to be.

Commentary/Spectator Section: Chances are, that panning from the entranceway to the ring/trampoline/wrestling area, the camera will catch a glimpse of this little place. Now there really isn't much you can do for the spectator section except for maybe have a banner over where they're sitting, and make sure that the chairs are all even and whatnot. As for the commentary station (as I like to call it), you can hang some kind of covering from the front of the table so you don't see the commentator's legs under the table. May I suggest putting your fed's initials and/or name on this covering =)?

Ring/Trampoline/Wrestling Area: Now, I know you're thinking "How the hell could this look more professional?" And I'd say "Keep reading damnit." Once again, as always I'm really into letting people know you're fed's name and initials. Now, for a trampoline and ring, you can use spraypaint to do this. For the ground, they make semi-permanent paint that isn't very expensive and will come out when you cut the grass or when it rains a few times. But then, your parents or some other person say "Are you FN nuts? That's a $450 trampoline! There's no way in hell you're spraypainting anything on it." Now IDW has had a ghetto ring for a long time... but before we were IDW... we were... ah, well that ain't important. However, before wed tape on the trampoline, wed be sure to bust out the "street chalk." As long as your trampoline still has some stiffness to it, this shit works great. Another good idea is to put your web address near your initials or name.

The ACTUAL Entrance: Ok, now this is kinda important. You all know basically how to make it look good, its just the things you have to practice to make it look great. First off, your entrance must be well timed. Not like when the announcer/commentator announces you, but you have to have a spot in your entrance theme where you can picture yourself coming out and looking badass (if you don't have a theme, ignore this whole music part). Like, one of my fed-mates uses Incubus "Vitamin" as his entrance theme. He always comes out once it gets hard to the loud rock part. Without fail. Always the same part, no matter what. That's a good habit to get into. Now if you have fog machines, or strobe lights, or any other kind of effect... they also must be well timed. They SHOULD go with the music. It just makes things look better. However, you might want to start the fog machine a little earlier so that the smoke/chalk powder gets up in the air a little to intensify the effect. Also, make sure you do something when you enter. Unless of course you're a badass kinda character, where you could just walk slow and threatening like to the ring (which is kinda like doing something, right?). Like I personally like holding my fists in the air while bouncing about, then doing a backflip. It gets the crowd hyped up.

Commentary: In some cases, sounding professional is just as good as looking professional. Make sure that your commentators know what's going on. Not should they know the names of wrestling moves, but also when things are going to happen (so they can act surprised). Also, give them a time frame of when the match is gonna end, so that on the first near 3 they don't say "1,2,3!...oh wait, so and so has made the ref reverse the call."

Well, golly, I sure hope that some of this has given everybody an idea or two on how to improve their fed's image. Once again, my E Mail is or Keep it semi-safe. Zero, over and out.

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