ZERO TOLERANCE #3 - By Zero
Another problem that has been voiced is "Zero, why does every show we put on suck?" And rather than listen to the speaker cry like a little biatch with a skinned knee, I'd say "Well, I don't know, but if you read the column, you won't put on shitty shows anymore grasshopper." So read on, for your events will suck no more!

Match Pace: Ok, I'll admit, this can be a problem. As a matter of fact, I've recently realized that my fed has a problem with it too. Now there are certain situations where you want the match to be faced paced, and ones when you want it to go at a normal pace. YOU NEVER WANT A SLOW MATCH....EVER. Why? Because slow matches make people bored. I could tell you how when we watched out 4 way ladder match for our heavyweight title the pace was way too slow, but I won't because it's pointless. Whoops. Anyway, if your match has a lot of chain wrestling, then you will probably want a faster match. If your match has tables, or sporadic highflying moves, or powerhouses, then you probably want a regular paced match. Usually, in lightweight matches, the matches will naturally tend to go faster. In matches with bigger guys, it might go slower. When you have a mix, the match tends to go at an average pace. Getting to the point, keep the matches fast, and entertaining.

Kayfabe, the art of doing flashy moves: Some people swear by it, others think it is unnecessary in the backyard. In my opinion, I think it can be helpful, but not always needed. Ok, Ill give you an example of some kayfabe. Not so kayfabe: An elbow drop. Kayfabe: The people's elbow. Now, while the people's elbow sucks ass, the fans love it. You don't see camera flashes when No-name Johnny drops an elbow. Another example: While a frog splash looks cool, RVD's five star frogsplash looks wicked. And the thing is, they both hurt the same and feel the same, but RVD tweaks it out and makes it looker cooler. Get it? Good. Try to make moves entertaining, but don't take it to Rock-like proportions. Because while people want to see flashy moves, backyarders aren't idiots, they're your target tape-sale demographic, and they'll just laugh at you if they see you trying to use a move that that (seriously). And if you're doing it for an audience, they'll instantly pick up on the corniness.

Selling: SELL EVERYTHING. Except of course, if you're gimmick is to be some gigantic unstoppable monster, similar to Kane. But even Kane sells moves my friend! You cant just keep throwing punches after being hit with a chair, you at least have to pause, or become dazed. Im almost positive that in your early days (Yes, that means YOU), you've had to sell a shot with... a box. Yes, just a plain old cardboard box, be it a pizza box, a soda box, or whatever, you've had to sell it. And if you can sell that, then you've already got it, but if not, then you need some schooling in the art of selling moves. But thats another column... maybe.

Snazz up your shows!: It really isn't that hard, I swear! Auxiliary battery powered multi-speed strobe lights can be bought for 15-30 bucks. Now get two of those, and use them if you like. Smoke machines go for 20-70 bucks, I recommend the middle priced ones being as you get what you pay for. Have a relatively loud stereo/radio/CD player, whatever, because the general consensus of people like their music loud. Try to have commentators and/or announcers, because they not only get the crowd pumped, they also get the wrestlers pumped, and it makes your fed look more organized and professional.

Storylines: People say they don't matter. I say they're wrong. Now there have been numerous debates on this topic on all the major BYW boards. Now while they CAN be pointless (I said it), they can also increase the... uhmm... goodness of a show. Good wrestling is great to have, and in order to put on an EXCELLENT show, its a must. However, storylines make the show/tape THAT much more engrossing. It especially helps for people watching your tapes. If people don't know that Guy A has been fighting with Guy B for X months and that Guy C is plotting on Guy A, then people won't understand when Guy C jumps in on Guy A and B's match, and the wrestling just isn't going to convey that message. You have to use mic cuts, confrontations, sneak attacks, and any other behind the scenes action to your advantage. As p0rk put it, The wrestling will make you want to watch, but the storylines will get you hooked.

Suprise: I hate run-of-the-mill ho-hum stuff. Be innovative. Have interference, have original gimmicks, have double crosses. They all add to the surprise of the viewers. The whole surprise thing works nicely with the storylines by the way. =) Now, if you let your viewers know, in some way or another, that say, a given tag-team has been together since the beginning of the fed, then they'll still crap their pants (EVEN if its their first time watching) when they see this tag-team beating the shit out of each other over mistrust, lost matches, accidental injury, etc. And imagine what the followup show or grudge match would be like! People think this way, whether you believe me or not, they do. You can definitely use surprise to your advantage, and IT WILL GIVE YOU THE ADVANTAGE over competition without it.

Woooo! 3rd issue. Damn I'm cool (well, not cool, more nifty than cool). Once again, if you wanna send one of your problems to me, or flame me, or mail bomb me, etc., send everything to GimmieTheDonut@aol.com or IDWFederation@aol.com. Thats Zero Tolerance, over and out.


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